6 February 2012 - death squad accessible

My local mass transit agency is putting new trains in service. The new trains don’t rattle like the old ones yet, so to maintain the noise level they make automated announcements at every stop. And such dull announcements! Why do they ignore all my suggestions? It would be easy to liven up the ride:

“Now approaching Mogadishu, a death squad accessible station. For the safety and convenience of all passengers, if you are fleeing a death squad, please keep your head down.”